-Jon Kabat-Zinn
Gerren often experiences anxiety with new people, situations, and places. Her expression of the anxiety is a loud and clear "NO!!!" directed at the closest person, animal or bug that moves or makes a sound. I have internal reactions of anger and embarrassment that make me want to stop her when she speaks to other people or beloved pets that way. My mindfulness practices have helped me to see my intentions are to help her maintain the freedom to express herself and understand personal responsibility when this occurs. We have found one solution to be covering her ears. At age 2 1/2 she understands this clearly. Evidence of the difference that skill is making for her: Yesterday as she napped in the car a train blew it's horn. Expecting an upset response I looked in the rearview mirror to see a sleeping child with one ear pressed against the car seat and one ear covered with her small hand. She has begun to show increased confidence in situations when she realizes covering her ears are an option....like the night we were seated outdoors at a busy restaurant. Without hesitation she covered her ears, frowned, and turned to face the table of folks behind us who were being fully expressed speaking loudly. Mindfulness, the no-judgment part, worked best for me in that moment.
No comments:
Post a Comment