Gerren: "Mom I'm hungry." Me: "ok, look in the fridge for what you'd like". Gerren: I want blueberries."
The thoughts came to mind: "Don't get any on your dress. She'll scream about taking her dress off to clean it." Then..."let it go"...still in my yoga position but hardly present to the peace of the moment.
Gerren walks into the living room, carrying the bag of blueberries that had been frozen & were not thawed.
Then I saw it:
"New rug, hole in the bag, blueberry drips on the rug, trying to get the stain out, failing to get the stain out, husband upset."
I requested, "Please take those in the kitchen". Gerren responded, as she often does, "NO!" with a scowl.
I jumped up from my peaceful posture and made an intense request..."GERREN take those into the kitchen!" Then, giving away my lack of presence I blurted, "Do you see I'm frustrated?!?"
She just looked at me.
Then I saw it. The true reality, in her eyes. She held the intact bag of blueberries, looking at me with a bit of fear and a lot of confusion.
"Wow" I said, "I am not upset at you, I am upset because of the thoughts I created." "I thought...." and I proceeded to fill her in on the gap between her joy about the blueberries and my anger about the possibility of mess, stain, unhappy people etc...
"And none of that is what happened. I love you."
"Do you understand?"
She nodded.
